what we have

Oh man... I just want to write it all down. Every day I think I'll remember this, I'll not forget this, I'll write this down, but there is so little time... so much LIVING! Samara is singing. Singing real songs like the Itsy Bitsy Spider, Twinkle Twinkle, the ABCs, I Love You, and you can hear the tune, the words, see the actions, it's incredible. And she can count to 10 and say the alphabet! Sure, it's not perfect, but it's pretty darn remarkable in my eyes. Her word explosion is something to behold. She took her sweet time uttering mama and bottle, but all of sudden burst out with octopus, green beans and Swiper, no swiping! So funny. My favorites are still 'oh no', 'oh yeah', 'oh boy', 'oh woh' and all those other jaw-droppers. She also is just too cute when it comes to 'i know' and 'i don't know', 'i see' and the past-tense genuis, 'i saw', 'love you', 'bless you', 'tissue?', and every name under the sun. Just heart-meltingly beautiful is when she points at herself and says 'sissssy!' and kisses my 'tuuummmy!' and gives me a 'squeeeeze' and a 'pat-pat-pat'. I still have to bribe her for kisses on the lips, but they are luscious and I can't believe what an adorable monkey of a child we have. Gosh, if we are 1% as lucky again, we're just too lucky. I'm still going on my not-so-hunch of D2 being a boy, but I said that last time, and while I once thought we absolutely had to have a boy someday, I appreciate sisters more and more and know we'll get the baby that God has made for us and our lives will be... perfect in that way.

In other news, we lost our tenant of 33 days today. Long story, but he was in deep financial crisis and was not ready to be a tenant now or soon. As much as my heart goes out to him, we have big bills to pay and a baby well and truly on its way (Dr said today my bones have parted...hence the terrible groin pains) and we have a reality of our own. And so, we're back to square one and I'm hoping the enormous and sinking bump I carry up and down those many stairs as we show prospective tenants incites a little sympathy! That's okay, right?

I never updated after our last level 2, but thank you for the comments and prayers. Sweet Baby D2 is growing well and Mr. Serious/Pessimist/I never took Bedside Manner 101 at Med School winked at me and restored some of my faith in all these silly tests. Quite frankly, I don't know half of what we've had and while we maintained we didn't want any of them, I understood that in some cases, we could have given our little one a better shot at a healthy arrival by knowing some major stats... ie.. a baby with a hole in its heart could be born with a transplant ready in Boston, rather than wasting that precious time. Nonetheless, I'm ever so glad these invasive and not even conclusive tests are behind us and everything, as ever, is in God's hands.

I have 4 more weeks of work! I love my job, love my students, and will admit to wishing that baby makes his/her arrival more or less on time so that maybe, just maybe, I can attend their graduation on 6/11, conduct my girls acapella group on that day, and hug each of them goodbye, but I know it might not happen. Marina's graduation is 6/6 and I'm also so hopeful that I can be there. I know a C-Section will keep me off my feet for a few days, but I'll do my best. We're hoping and planning on a VBAC but I know ever so well now that it doesn't matter what it takes to get there, what awaits is more than any of it. It's bound to be one of the best and hardest days of my life, I already know. Oh... isn't life crazy. But, we can't wait to meet our little one!

The days tick by. I am so grateful for where we are, what we have, the people who surround us. I'm exhausted a lot, but laugh and smile so deeply each and every day. Money, time, tenant, health stresses aside, you can't really ask for more than that.