Nana

Nana keeps a large atlas beside the piano. From Boston to Bogota, Cambridge to Caracas, she plotted out our every move, sometimes even before us children knew exactly where we were going, and it was her steady pianists’ fingers that reminded me that San Pedro Sula is actually not so far from Havana, and that in reality, nowhere is far from home. Our destinations and dreams were her own, not only because Nana and Papa journeyed transcontinentally wherever we went and cherished our postcards so dearly, but also because no one was ever as excited about our adventures as her.

For me, Wigton Lane was my home away from home throughout my 5 years at university in England. Nana would stand on the edge of the driveway or the platform at the station up to two hours before my scheduled arrival, come rain or snow, waiting for me to appear. I’ve never known anyone who welcomes people so generously that she cannot simply wave hello with her hand, but rather her entire arm, body and heart. In her warmth and enthusiasm, she beckons us all to come close, just as we are now.

She is a magnifier of talent, goodness and gentle company. Some may know her as the humble, jolly, doting woman that she is with a silver treble clef hanging over her heart. I am honored to know her as the kind of grandmother who travels cross-country to not only hear her granddaughter sing, but also be everyone’s favorite at the after-show party. I know her as the sweet, rhythmic hand that stroked my big Hare head when it got stuck in the bunk beds. I know her as a fellow sweet-tooth who makes the world’s best flapjacks and always has chocolate in the cupboard. I know her as the voice at the end of the telephone that coos in delight at any good news and makes every cloud have a double silver lining.

She is, to me, a daily reason to trust in love and look for that little patch of blue sky that she reminds us always appears. While we all will strive to be a little more like her every day, I also know that as I look up, that little patch of blue sky will now be more beautiful than ever.

In Memory of my Nana

Nana playing Be Thou My Vision with my father singing at our wedding in 2006

Nana died on Tuesday night. I am so sad my little Samara never got to meet her amazing great grandmother. On Monday we are traveling to England to say our last goodbyes. We remember her with gratitude and pride that such a kind, selfless and talented lady was ours for so long. I cannot believe she is gone.

My Baby's getting so big...

I know how to hug now...

And this is me doing my business...

But best of all are my smiles...

From Home

Nana is holding on. I know she feels the strength of our prayers and love surrounding her and while I wish she could live forever, we have to remind ourselves of how lucky we are to have been a part of her amazing 89 years of melodious joy. My every thought is with my father, the most devoted son, who faces a life without his Mummy. I dare not think of how heartbreaking that would be. I look into my little one's eyes and simply cannot imagine a day when we are not bound so closely as one.

Samara and I went to our first baby group today with our friends Jennifer and Baby Beatrice and it was a lot of fun. She is getting bigger and bigger everyday, starting to gaze more deeply and smile more meaningfully. I can't believe such a beautiful little one came from inside me. I feel so blessed. When she wakes up in the morning and the yellow sun and blue waves sparkle through our bedroom window and she finds my adoring eyes, the connection is unbelievable. Despite any tiredness I may feel from a rough night or any soreness from endless hours of nursing, my heart melts in hers. She makes every second so poignant. I love being a mother!


And as one more reminder of the majesty and hope in this life, this rainbow guided our hearts all the way to Nana's...